If you didn't see it in the title, this will spoil any and everything I can think of in my book.
If you haven't read it, STOP HERE NOW!!!
Behind the Scenes
Sviche was originally a main character. She survived Chutwex's *ahem* rage in early drafts and went to the Mirror Universe instead of Mmiiick. Mmiiick, interestingly, died by Crawpox's hand shortly after she almost killed her dad. I used to have more reservations about my main characters murdering people, but them I realized they are probably the least moral-conscious characters in the book--at the beginning at least--so it is completely in character for them to murder without remorse. One of the ways I like mentally categorize the main trio is "two of them are utter loons and the other is a pyromaniac who killed hundreds of people." Quikterr is really the only stable person of the three, and I wonder if it makes him boring. Sviche was too boring in the first draft, so I got her off the Hiatus Quest and into the assassination attempted category. I hope Quikterr can hold his own, at least.
One of the main things that wasn't working was the Mirror Universe. For a great while, the people who revolt were pacifist feminists--they worked really slowly to bring about equal rights among genders and Chutwex decided to speed things up by a lot more than they could handle. It came out as ridiculously anvilicious and it just didn't fit. I'm not saying that everything is polished in that section just yet, but the current revolt motivation is probably the most natural. An artifact of the whole feminist thing can be seen in that the only named revolutionaries are female while the others are male. I might change that eventually, but I don't think it's too glaring right now, so I'll let it be.
In general, the last third could use extreme polishing. I wrote some scenes there only a few days before releasing it to alphas. So I'm looking for less nitty-gritty and more general stuff there, feedback-wise.
Oh, and Mmiiick's beef with her dad has been her driving force for almost as long as she has been a character. If you look closely, she has no viewpoint sections until after she poisons Bonim'lo. Early drafts had some viewpoints of hers before then, but I decided that it was better to filter her through others to prevent the reader from realizing just how bonkers she is. Also, writing to specifically avoid using contractions and apostrophes can be difficult. If you had not noticed, it was a quirk that Mmiiick had. People she was related to had it as well, although to a lesser degree. The irony of her alias having an apostrophe is not lost to me.
I didn't plan this, but I recently noticed that Mmiiick, Chutwex, and Quikterr each serve as two parts of the body/mind/heart dichotomy--and in many ways, the lack is what defines them. Mmiiick is missing heart, Chutwex is missing mind, and Quikterr is missing body. I think all three get a bit better by the end, but there's still a long way to go for each of them.
Interesting fact: Chutwex has only "died" in one way throughout all the drafts--location and surrounding characters differ somewhat, but Quikterr dying is what triggers Chutwex dying. All drafts brought him back to life (although I really did mean to kill both of them the first time around--until they were still needed). Quikterr has also died in the Mirror Universe in a somewhat recent draft, but I couldn't arrange things to make it happen again in the current draft. Maybe I'll figure out a way--he really ought to die. Maybe the story could last a little longer...or I could end up with a bit of sequelitis. But not now. I'm on hiatus.
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